And to think we eat these back home ...

Capitalist progoganda machine

This from the letters page in this months Weekly Worker:


Dear red English comrads!

Sorry for my English. I want just to say, enough
dream about fucking communizm. I
am already was living with him. No
money, no food, no freedom, nothing.
Even no sex ...

Igor
Russia

32 hours in Rwanda

David Cameron is in trouble after a being asked in Rwanda by a local TV journalist "What do you have to say about continuing with your visit to Rwanda when part of your constituency is currently devastated by floods?".

Cameron had decided to clear off to Rwanda to try and trump Gordon Brown on International Development with a team of 45 or so MPs and hangers on.

Cameron thought that being photographed on Sunday afternoon in his Witney consituency before heading to the airport would provide cover for his long planned African adventure despite being in the midst of a developing national disastour at home. Unfortunatly for him his two by election defeats coupled with a continued Brown bounce in the polls has meant the political tide is now starting slop over the top of the Tory leader's wellies.

At a meeting for Rwandan MPs, at which only 12 turned up, the Chamber was momentarily plunged into darkness following a power surge. "I'm happy to see you again" said Cameron when the lights returned.

Lucky disgraced front bencher, Patrick Mercer, wasn't there or there might have been further embarassing jokes about not being able to "see 'em if they don't smile and shut their eyes".

Get out and fucking push

Luckily in the People's Republic of China mobile phones are not authorised to those without special permission from their unit.



Those repsonsible for the offending piece of footage can expect a lengthy period of self criticism.

Shirley Bin Laden

Madame Mao is shocked and horrified that a 51 year old divorcee from Cheshire has married one of Osama Bin Laden's sons who is only half her age.

Doesn't she know marriage is an outmoded concept and a construct of male gender hegemony?

I wonder what the wedding dress will be like ... ?

Machete prices - slashed

While Gordon Brown and David Cameron square up to each other across the dispatch box armed only with their wit Madame Mao has noted that the bottom has fallen out of the machete market in Nigeria following the presidential elections.

It would seem that the machete is the weapon of choice for Nigeria's political thugs and the price of a good quality blade has dropped from £1.50 to 75p. Such is supply and demand.

One trader reports that before the election he was selling seven machetes a day and now he can hardly shift one.

Is there a Minister for machetes in Nigeria, I wonder? If there is I would imagine he's shitting himself in case he gets a delegation from the Machete Manufacturers Union.

Miss Atom 2007

At last Miss Atom 2007 has been crowned. The search to find the most beautiful woman working in the Russia nuclear industry in the former Soviet Republics is finally over.

Readers will remember that Madame Mao is not only good friends with Danielle Lloyd but also that she was Comrade Miss Shanghai 1935.

Since those heady days I've kept a keen eye on Socialist beauty pageants. Shame that despite being in an age of oligarchy where Moscow boasts 35 billionaires and some of the most expenseive hotel accomodation in the Northern Hemisphere that the competition organisesrs could only afford an old school gym to crown Miss Atom 2007.